Saturday, September 21, 2002

Sore throats bite the dust. I'm tired.

Be Happy.

Wednesday, September 18, 2002

Ah, lazy Wednesday. Hump day. Damn, I need some of that soon. You know, after a while, masturbation just loses it's fun. Haha. I finally learned a new song on my guitar....Ode to Joy, although I haven't been feeling all that joyous lately. Friends make it easier to deal. Although it's really irritating when they ask you what's wrong, you tell them what's up but don't wanna go into details, and they still bug you about it. What's WRONG with these people? Arg....*sighs*....They mean well.

Toth to be, wither to touch
A cheek, a smile, soft yet sharp
Piercing blue eyes.
My love.
For life....

Sleep tight. Don't let the bedbugs rip out your heart and throw it up against the wall.

Tuesday, September 17, 2002


Thumbing through the pages of my fantasies
Pushing all the mercy down, down, down
I wanna see you try to take a swing at me
Come on, gonna put you on the ground, ground, ground

Chorus 1
Why are you trying to make fun of me?
You think it's funny?
What the fuck you think it's doing to me?
You take your turn lashing out at me
I want you crying with your dirty ass in front of me

Chorus 2
All of my hate cannot be found
I will not be drowned by your thoughtless scheming
So you can try to tear me down
Beat me to the ground
I will see you screaming

Thumbing through the pages of my fantasies
I'm above you, smiling at you, drown, drown, drown
I wanna kill and rape you the way you raped me
And I'll pull the trigger
And you're down, down, down

(Chorus 1 and 2 repeat)

All my friends are gone, they died (gonna take you down)
They all screamed, and cried (gonna take you down)

I'm never (?) against the wall
Gonna take you down

(Chorus 2 repeats twice)

Sunday, September 15, 2002

Am I really heinous? Is my family only saying i'm beautiful to make me feel better? Is my boyfriend saying he loves me to soften the blow that he really loves me AND another girl? What the hell is wrong with me? Should I stay or should I go....Fuck, i don't know anymore....maybe I should just fuck some random guys to prove a point...But what point would that be? That i CAN fuck other guys and not just my boyfriend, who, by the way is turning 20 in two weeks and have never slept with because i don't wanna send him to jail? Why should he be allowed to sleep with other girls and I shouldn't be allowed to sleep with other guys? Then there's the major long distance factor, about 80 miles from here to Duncan....I'm fuckin strained, and nobody wants to deal with me. But hey, at least I'm gonna have two people waiting to fuck me when i'm 16, so WA-FUCKIN-HOO, okay? This is insane. I love him. He loves me. Plus another girl. I don't know what i'm gonna do. Why am i putting this on here? This is fuckin public....well hey, if you've read this, I hope you've found it interesting.

Don't drink and drive.